WARNING!
Ben Andrews (us)
Distributor | Released | Length |
---|---|---|
Lucas Entertainment | 2007 | 117 |
Description source: promotional material
Going on coffee runs, copying documents, answering phones, typing emails... and stocking up on lube? When you're an intern at a gay adult entertainment company, it's all in a day's work. Lucas Entertainment exclusive Ben Andrews stars in the sex comedy "The Intern," where Botox-injecting bosses (Michael Lucas), sassy assistants (new Lucas exclusive Christian Cruz), and beefy delivery men (Matt Cole) abound. "Ugly" Benny maneuvers his way through the wacky, sexy offices of Trojan Studios, but his co-workers soon discover he may have a "bigger" talent in his pants.
Opening: With his totally "uncool" attire and wide-rimmed glasses, nerdy Benny (Lucas exclusive Ben Andrews) makes his way through the busy streets of New York City to the office of gay porn company Trojan Studios, where he wants to apply in person for an internship. Ben is mistakenly herded into a porn star casting call conducted by super-diva boss Alexander Mann (Michael Lucas) when all he really came for was the office internship. Sassy assistant Christian (Lucas exclusive Christian Cruz) apologizes for the mix-up and hires Benny on the spot.
Benny's first day on the job finds him getting coffee and assisting on a chaotic shoot between two hot models (Lucas exclusive Jonathan Vargas and hottie Jason Ridge). Alexander directs the cheesy dialogue and hot sex, which features the two models sucking each other's huge dicks, flip-flop fucking, and taking on a huge black double-headed dildo. During the filming, Christian is shocked to notice a giant bulge forming in Ben's pants.
Back in the company stockroom, two beefy straight dudes (Jimmy and Zack Randall) are busy talking pussy while stacking boxes of Liquid Spanish Fly. They drop a box, and as they clean up the green gooey mess, a strange urge brews between them… and before they know it they're making out, sucking cock, licking ass, and fucking. Jimmy's big uncut member drills Zack on the table top, and Zack discovers a talent for sucking his own dick while sucking Jimmy's at the same time.
The office gets a huge box delivered by hunky delivery guy Massimo (Matt Cole). Alexander (Michael Lucas) is pissed to hear that it is the oversized prototype for his dildo. Massimo sticks around for the signature and reveals to Alexander his ambition to be a porn star. Alexander auditions him on the office table with a heavy suck and fuck session that includes a "helicopter" spin. They negotiate an exclusive model contract right before their nuts burst in orgasm.
While Benny (Lucas exclusive Ben Andrews) daydreams about smashing a pie in Alexander's face, assistant Christian (Lucas exclusive Christian Cruz) "accidentally" spills water on Benny's crotch. It's a ploy to see what's really in Benny's pants, and Christian finds out in the office utility bathroom, revealing the size queen's dream: the biggest dick he has ever seen! He sucks on the huge uncut shaft like a pro before whipping out a "You Gotta Be Kidding"-sized condom to get fucked around the room. Christian then eats the cum up!
Christian tells Alexander the scoop, and Alexander has a chat with Benny (Lucas exclusive Ben Andrews) before casting him in his first scene as Ben Hardwick! Ben plays "whose is bigger" in the scene opposite a hot model (Derrick Hanson), who drops his ruler in shock at Ben's massive endowment. The crew is in shock as Ben uses his tool to give Derrick a good drilling… and a new porn super-stud is born!
The horny night editor (Lucas exclusive Ray Star) gets a much-needed late night visit from assistant Christian (Lucas exclusive Christian Cruz). The two suck and fuck in multiple positions, with the night editor pounding Christian with his big uncut cock before pulling out to cum in his gaping mouth.
Michael Lucas pisses in twink Zack Randall's hungry mouth in a bathroom and even drinks up some of his own piss to spit it back in Zack's mouth. Then Zack pisses into his OWN mouth and on Michael's dick before Michael jerks his load, which Zack swallows. Zack then blows his own load all over himself, and Michael brings it full circle and once again pees on him, washing all the cum, spit and sweat away!
Often given to straight-faced serious plots, Lucas Entertainment turns downright slaphappy silly with "The Intern," at once a spoof of ABC's "Ugly Betty" and also of its producer and his empire. Tony Dimarco has written one of his best scripts yet, and has filmed it with ideal precision. Ben Andrews is the nominal star, though because of the plot, he doesn't get to really "star" until late in the movie, so in the meantime, the deck is stacked with ace performers who get caught up in the giddy light-hearted momentum to turn in sex scenes every bit as crackling as the situations.
Geeky Ben Andrews, done up to look like someone who was made extreme fun of in high school and still hasn't addressed the physical and wardrobe issues associated with that look into adulthood, is applying for an intern position at a gay porn company. Trojan Studios is a fast-paced office with lots of color and movement, awfully scary to timid Ben. It's run by Michael Lucas, who can shout on the phone while receiving Botox injections (as an aside, Michael Lucas' face is tighter than any asshole in this movie, but rather than sporting the usual Botox deadened visage, he looks magnificently handsome), a ruthless antagonist sending up his own over-the-top persona. At the moment, his primary problem is that his studio doesn't have a stable star with a huge gigantic cock, despite the reams of wanna-be models showing up for auditions.
As a pack of these guys are ushered into Michael's office, Ben is mistakenly among them, noticeable for his lack of style with all the tight T-shirt and jeans guys standing in a row waiting for Michael to judge their cocks (does this scene remind anyone of Madeline Kahn's infamous singing declaration of penile wonderment in "History of the World" Part I"? Anyone? Oh, fine, skip it!). Luckily, Ben is saved from the line-up by Michael's fussy assistant, brunet stunner Christian Cruz, who hires him despite Ben's lack of experience and questionable fashion sense. At least Ben can type, taking a dictated letter from Michael easily.
Ben is privy to the filming of a sex scene, featuring any number of clashing egos and tempers. Michael roars to the cast members that the inspiration for the scene is "Samson and Delilah," which makes little sense to the confused models, crewmembers or even the snoozing geezer in the corner who intends to fluff, if needed. After a bit of tawdry dialogue, cute long-faced Jonathan Vargas and the always-classy Jason Ridge get down to work, kissing and disrobing to Michael's orders. An increasingly-beefy Jason gets his cock sucked first, and Jonathan proves to be an earnest blower, actually dominating the action with his mouth full. Jonathan has a giant hardon waiting for Jason by the time he's ready to suck, and Jason takes to it with a drooling mouth, having fun with the foreskin as his saliva drips down the dick. A 69 keeps both men focused, and soon they are indulging in mutual ass-munching. Jason concentrates on opening Jonathan up with a finger while Jonathan is content to use his tongue. Jason starts out using a dildo on Jonathan, but since it's double-headed the two are soon bumping booties riding it together. It's Jason who stays on all-fours to get fucked by Jonathan, slamming into Jason with increasing force and excellent speed. They roll around on the bed from position to position without Jonathan having to pull out, very much in tune with each other. Then it's Jonathan's turn to bottom, and Jason's fuck has them both working gymnastically. With Jason still fucking him, Jonathan cums and then Jason pulls out to finish. I don't know if this achieved Michael's Samson and Delilah approach, but they sure as hell created sparks!
Also employed at the company are two guys in the shipping department who aren't thrilled by the gay sex going on around them, but they have learned to deal with it. Slightly bearded Jimmy, with his goofy big smile, and tall lean Zack Randall are discussing the merits of their girlfriends' respective pussies when a box of Spanish Fly is dropped. Just as Zack is admitting his glee at the way pussy "winks at you," the two start to passionately make out, drawn to each other by the aphrodisiac, unable to stop themselves as Zack races down to blow Jimmy. "It does taste like honey," Zack notes as he gulps many inches of Jimmy's dick, even getting all the way down at times. Zack is awfully peppy, and Jimmy coos delightedly at his mouth-and-hand combo blowjob. Spanish Fly-induced or not, Zack's lust for Jimmy's uncut dick seems boundless. Insatiable for his buddy, Zack even stuffs his face into Jimmy's hairy ass and rims with head snapping that I hope is medically insured for whiplash. Zack is so into being active here, he even sucks his own dick! Zack is in bottoming position before Jimmy has even unwrapped the condom, but when Jimmy is fully inserted, Zack is back to stealing the scene, letting Jimmy in with an unobstructed highway. Jimmy is tentative to start, apparently not realizing that Zack demands the fullest sex can offer. During the fuck, he learns the lesson better, especially with Zack backing up on him to show how deep he can take it. A switch to missionary position is more natural for Jimmy, who now crams Zack deeply, Zack showing appreciation with his constant hardon. It stays that way until Zack unloads it all over his chest, then patiently waiting for Jimmy to leave more goo there. They are caught while dressing, being told, "I always knew you were gay." Blame it on that Spanish Fly.
A rip-roaring dialogue scene has Michael plumping up his lips with a syringe while Christian tries to tell him he's found the big cock Michael has needed. "The intern!" "I have an intern?" Michael chirps, as if his coffee has been delivering itself, revealing a hidden flair for comedic timing that matches Christian's hysterically emotive performance. Returning to his filler, Michael gives Christian the job of finding out if Ben is really as hung as Christian suspects.
Giant he-man Matt Cole comes to make a delivery to the office. The receptionist flirts with him, tossing every package pun at him until realizing that the box, bigger than a human, contains the dildo Michael has been waiting for. There's a mistake here, because it's "life size," which here means the size of a human, not of a human penis. Though Michael is unhappy, Matt takes an opportunity to nervously offer himself as a potential model, ripping off his clothes with a stripper's ease, so that when he's wearing only a yellow bikini, Michael is interested enough to start kissing him. Michael then gets naked, his wowing pecker almost trumping all of Matt's muscles and pert buns. Matt is auditioning, so blowing Michael is a must. Matt goes into overdrive to make it work, slurping deep, taking spit from Michael as lube and trying every trick a sucker can use. Michael has to be impressed as buckets of drool are used to smooth Matt's pathway to Michael's pubes. Michael still hasn't kicked Matt out after Matt shows his dick, which is another good sign. They 69 briefly before Michael rolls Matt in half and works at his ass with a pushy tongue and probing fingers. Michael then slides his dick into Matt with almost alarming ease, immediately forging ahead with a power-fuck. Matt is a big guy, so Michael has to work extra hard to remain in control. He is up to the challenge and a mutated scissor-fuck in doggy position is superb. Matt then rides Michael's dick a bit before getting splayed with his legs wide apart. Michael further pushes that position, with Matt upside down. Mid-fuck, the two negotiate Matt's contract with not a hint of let-up in the force. Matt shoots loudly with Michael still at work and then Michael cums. Does a cum-shot count as a signature in a gay porn contract?
Ben has adapted to the pace of the office, able to juggle multiple coffee cups and a cellphone, but he's not sold on the boss. In fact, he has a wicked fantasy about him. Asked to bring a pie, which Michael snaps is the wrong one, Ben instead slams it in Michael's face, leaving Michael Lucas looking humiliated, something that shows his personal devotion to this film. That's how far he's willing to go for comic effect, wearing whipped cream on his famous puss!
Back in the real world, Christian, sporting trademark Lucas pink, and looking divine in it, purposely spills a cup on Ben's pants, naturally having to undress him to work on the stain. Bending over to show his ass, Christian then seductively takes a towel to Ben's crotch, sensually rubbing it so that Ben can't help but get hard. Christian is awestruck when he sees Ben's fully hard dick, a wonder of nature that has Christian spouting in Spanish. In the moment of cock reveal, Ben's entire nerd routine is smashed. Now he's Ben Andrews again, the horse-hung star who frightens even the most experienced bottoms. Undaunted, Christian opens his mouth wide and gulps for all he can of the uncut piece. A marvel himself, Christian gives it one of the best blowjobs I've ever seen it receive. "Like a fucking elephant," he says between long trips down it. Ben stands almost perfectly still as Christian works on devouring him, never giving up on his ultimate goal: a deep-throat of Ben Andrews. He works on the balls and foreskin now and then to give his mouth a rest, but it's always temporary, because that goal remains. Having earned his stripes, Christian strips down to his deliciously tight muscular frame, macking with Ben as a giant wall-sized portrait of Michael Lucas glares at them. Ben rims Christian, retaining his nerd glasses, but proving himself to be a sexual dynamo. He eats voraciously from Christian's perfect butt, with Christian roaring in ripples of Spanish pleasure. Ben's lapping tongue is as devoted as Christian's mouth was on his dick, so this section sizzled just as much. Luckily, their small space has condoms and lube, so a full fuck is possible. Christian invokes the Lord's name multiple times as Ben burrows into his ass, Ben's low-hanging balls jiggling with each push. If Christian never achieved the deep-throat, his ass makes up for it, finding room for every bit of Ben's cock, and with an ease that is the mark of an expert. Christian's ride is phenomenal, as now he is back in control and not only manages the same amount of dick, but with terrific speed, his own boner bouncing around as he goes. All over the room they fuck, Ben picking up steam until Christian has a hefty shot. When Ben is ready, Christian takes his cum-shot on his tongue and happily swallows down every bit. When Ben wonders aloud if this will cause loss of job, Christian replies, "don't worry, you will have job security." From intern to superstar in minutes!
The next day, Christian, clad again in a fetching shockingly bright ensemble that looks great on his body, can't wait to tell Michael of his discovery. Still in comic mode, Michael doesn't move so much as a facial muscle as he receives the news. He allows for a slight smile when Ben enters with his coffee, banishing Christian so he can chat with Ben alone. Their chat isn't shown, but Michael introduces Ben to the staff as their newest star, much to their surprise, sending a model home so Ben can replace him in the scene. "This is a make-up brush, not a scalpel," the make-up man opines to the nerdy intern. Finally, off come the glasses, and now Ben is fully ready. His hair is mussed a bit and in just a T-shirt, he looks far more comfortable.
His inaugural work pairs him with Derrick Hanson, a no-limits tattooed sort, losing his cocky demeanor when he sees Ben's hardon. The entire crew is astounded. Derrick hastens to apply his mouth to this infamous dick. Also insistent on a deep-throat, Derrick almost chokes himself working it. If Derrick doesn't have the zippy élan that Christian brought from his acting to his sexing, but Derrick works just as hard to conquer Ben. Just so it's not all about Ben's dick, they 69 so Ben can suck some cock, doing a fine job as Derrick continues to play on Ben, taking particular delight in his foreskin. The camera comes very close to Derrick's mouth-stretch, again highlighting just how gigantic Ben's cock is. Ben rims Derrick, prepping his ass with spit and tongue-fucking, not to mention the tickle of his light beard. I've long been a Derrick Hanson fan, and I know he can handle Ben. He proves that immediately, because Ben slides into him and starts off with gusto. No time is needed for Derrick to get used to it. After a brief fuck from behind, Derrick power rides Ben beautifully and then puts himself in an upside-down position to take more. This is their best position because Ben allows himself to have fun with it. Rarely an electric performer, letting his dick do all the work, it's nice to see Ben enjoy himself, which leads to a nice blast on Derrick's dick. Once Derrick cums, Ben has finished his first scene, no longer a nerdy intern, now a full-fledged star.
As noted above, Ben Andrews, though on the cover and though brandishing the biggest weapon in the arsenal, is not the full focus here. Instead, Tony Dimarco has spread that around to give performers like Christian Cruz a chance to steal the movie. Fully invested in the goofiness, Christian is the actual stand-out here, very funny in his dialogue scenes, and dead-on sexually, in the movie's best scene. This frothy confection has a brash sense of humor and sexual momentum to meet it. The good name of interns, so long ruined by political scandal, is returned through porn.
DVD features: Chapters; audio commentary; watersports (Michael Lucas and Zack Randall); deleted scene (Ray Star and Christian Cruz are every bit as delicious as the scenes in the main feature); behind-the-scenes footage; bloopers and outtakes; a special vignette showing the making of "the pie incident"; interviews (Jonathan Vargas, Jason Ridge, Ben Andrews, Michael Lucas and Mike Kashey); model bios; production blog excerpts; gallery; trailers ("Auditions 18," "Encounters: Burning Desire," "Cruising Budapest II: Ben Andrews," "The Bigger the Better," "Welcome to Paradise" and "Auditions 19"); and no regional coding (playable worldwide).
A DVD Review by Brent Blue