As Michael Lucas's little porn empire (which is, of course, a mere vassal to our own) has expanded, it was probably inevitable that he'd traipse over to Hungary to take advantage of the boundless cornucopia of porn talent there. "Cruising Budapest II: Ben Andrews" is the continuation of the chronicle of Lucas' sexploitation of central Europe, this time accompanied by Ben Andrews. We're not sure what Budapest really has to do with this movie; as nearly as the Emperor can tell, everything takes place in some anonymous rural inn. No travelogues here.

But you do get Ben Andrews and his famous giant cock. And he wastes no time introducing the various member-states of the E.U. to its gargantuan proportions. He and Michael arrive at the inn and are welcomed and shown around by a hunky bald guy (who unfortunately is in a non-sexual role only). Ben immediately makes friends with Ludovic Canot, who has been loitering in the lobby since the pair's arrival. This being porn, making friends means having sex, and Ben immediately invites the slender, dark-haired Frenchman to his room. After much kissing Ludovic tries to suck "Big" Ben's pole, but never gets down more than about half of it. That dick looks a lot like a baguette, so you'd think a French guy could handle it. After some 69 (Ludovic's average-sized dick is dwarfed by Ben's massiveness), Ben rims Ludovic's willing hole and prepares it for the grand entrance. His ass is evidently more capacious than his mouth, as he takes it all with little trouble. The contrast in size between Ludovic's small, tight ass and the giant cock is, well, startling. Ludovic stays nice and hard while they do it doggy and missionary, then Ben shoots over his new friend's open mouth, a few drops landing inside. Ludovic sucks on the head until he cums, most of his load zipping right out of the frame.

Michael, meanwhile, is sunbathing until he gets a call on his cellphone from German cutie-pie Marcel, who was cruising him at check-in earlier. Marcel comes right over. Theoretically, this is a massage visit. In reality, it's 30 seconds of massage followed by sex. Marcel is really adorable: well-built and fresh-faced, but masculine with a dark shadow of dense beard. He basically services Michael, slurping on his asshole, then his dick. Michael only gets involved when he starts a wet rimming of Marcel's twitching hole. They get in the 69 position, but Michael spends most of his time playing with Marcel's ass. He quickly moves to the fucking and soon introduces a fat dildo into their encounter. They fuck missionary, doggy and then reverse-cowboy (probably the best as Marcel really relishes bouncing on Michael's cock). As Michael cums on Marcel's face, a bit goes into the mouth and Marcel sucks the cummy dickhead and eats some off of Michael's hand. Michael finally shows Marcel's dick a little attention before re-fucking him to a climax.

Next, we're watching another massage at the blue dolphin pool. You know -- the one that's been in about 300 Hungarian videos. All blue tile, with a dolphin mosaic? An indoor pool? Yeah, that's the one. Evan Rochelle is rubbing down a nude Mario McGabe while Ben observes and whacks his meat on the other side of the pool. Evan's massage is highly specialized. It's a butt-massage only. And the massage oil is only applied to Mario's asscrack. Perhaps this is an old Hungarian tradition? Tall skinny Evan offers a coy, come-hither look in Ben's direction, and in no time Ben is giving Mario a tonsil massage with his massive club. Evan's own cock is just about as big; could this be too much of a good thing? Evidently not. Soon Ben and Mario are servicing Evan's fat slab, then Mario valiantly attempts both together, a futile task since he can barely get the tips in his mouth simultaneously. Ben gives Mario's dick some attention, and then licks his hole in preparation for the inevitable. Ben's fat cock quickly opens up Mario, and we're treated to several shots of withdrawals that leave Mario's relaxed hole gaping open about an inch. Ben slurps on Evan while fucking Mario to a gushing climax, but keeps going while Mario eats his own cum. Then everybody switches positions (just like in musical chairs) and Evan briskly fucks lanky Mario doggy while Mario sucks Ben. Mario even delivers some ass slaps that echo off the hard surfaces of the pool area. Ben switches off between Mario's and Evan's mouths, and then Mario has a second big climax while Evan does him missionary. Both Evan and Ben cum on Mario's face, with much of Evan's large load landing in Mario's mouth. Mario licks and sucks Evan's fat dick while cum oozes out his mouth.

Hairy porn veteran George Vidanov and a very tanned Claudio Antonelli are reading in some kind of lounge on two modern-looking leather couches in red and black. There's a plush, shaggy area rug on the floor. How European, and how convenient. Michael has only to enter the room and introduce Ben, and as soon as he leaves George and Claudio are going at it. Then we see why the nice, soft rug is there. Quickly falling into a 69 on top of it, these two well-muscled hunks are briefly spied upon by Ben before getting into an energetic flip-flop. First George bounces on Claudio reverse-cowboy and doggy, then George fucks Claudio doggy and missionary. Claudio knows at least one English word: "Yes! Yes!" The two then have side-by-side climaxes.

In another room, cute muscle boy Rick Bauer has fallen asleep on a chaise lounge while reading his book. It must have been something racy, because he has his pants undone and a hardon straining against his underwear. Rick looks totally adorable in clothes; there's something so innocent and boyish about him. In walks a totally depilated Ted Colunga. Now, if you're as big a fan of Ted as is your Emperor, you know that shaving all the hair off this furry guy (including his head!) is quite a chore. (There's a rumor going around the palace that he did it because he's started competing in bodybuilding contests.) There's just a little stubble visible in close-ups, undoubtedly growing in very uncomfortably. Without a word, semi-smooth Ted wakens cute little Rick and the sex begins. The two trade blowjobs, with Rick's being by far more enthusiastic (perhaps inspired by Ted's legendary mammoth meat). Michael, of course, spies in the window for a while. We suppose this counts as talent scouting. When Rick rims Ted, we find that his asshole is the only hairy place left on him. However, it's Ted who fucks first, pounding Rick doggy over the furniture. Rick then does the same to Ted, but more energetically. We do get to see Ted's highly expressive eyebrows raise during the fuck. (Oh -- you've never noticed this? Take a look next time you see him. No one has said so much with his eyebrows since Mr. Spock in Star Trek.) The two cum after Rick fucks Ted in one of those uncomfortable-looking, balanced-on-the-shoulders positions. Ted's cum-shot is remarkably minuscule.

And that's it. The movie abruptly ends, fading from Ted's softening dick. Leaving unanswered the burning question: what are the room rates at this place?

This is another creditable effort from Lucas. We were surprised to see Jòzsef Budai credited as videographer, since this seemed not at all like his other work. Like all Lucas films, there's no distracting porn music soundtrack, which give the sex a more realistic flavor, even if the "story" and set-ups are completely improbable. Marcel is a great discovery, cute and charming, and who could get too much of all the gigantic cocks in this video?

DVD features (2-disc set): Chapters; watersports (Evan pissing right onto Mario's hole -- nice aim Evan! -- while outside on a very green lawn; Michael peeing all over Marcel including in his mouth, thus perpetuating the stereotype that German boys are sex pigs; and Ben peeing in Ludovic's mouth and on his ass both indoors and out); behind-the-scenes footage (mostly various outtakes, including Lucas offering direction by modeling the action he wants, and Steve Hunt, a hairy cutie-pie from part I of the series, serving as a sort of reverse-fluffer for Ben, who sucks Steve in order to get hard for his topping; we also see Lucas ordering Evan and Mario to drop and give him some push-ups to warm them up -- Mario does them one-handed!); interviews (Ben Andrews, twice; Marcel; Mario McGabe; Claudio Antonelli and George Vidanov; Mario's is probably the most interesting; he's a Hungarian performer who self-identifies as gay; he also discusses his talent for multiple orgasms, the interview ends with Michael giving him a l-o-n-g kiss, we suspect later off-camera antics; Claudio is the most animated -- he's constantly smiling and laughing, and often seems at a loss for a reply, of course, he also has a girlfriend ... and despite his long career as a confirmed top, now that he's bottoming regularly, he says that he prefers it; finally, it's always a pleasure to hear George Vidanov's sexy, gravelly voice, and he's the only Hungarian in the cast who really speaks much English); trailers; and no regional coding (playable worldwide).

A DVD Review by The Porn Emperor