The only thing missing from "69: Discover the Secret!," an opulent epic from Catalina, is thousands of extras. However, the cast of 19 seems to do the work of thousands, reeling off their scenes with so much potent energy and sexual lust that even the convoluted plotline seems secondary. Every scene is a winner, adding up to one of Catalina's most astounding major releases.
The action starts in the present, with Steve Rambo being assaulted in the desert for reasons he doesn't understand. You see, he doesn't really know who he is. He sees visions in his mind, but they don't add up to a past. In order to unlock it, he tries going back to his "first real memory." So, we're in 1969, and with amazing attention to detail, the first scenes are shot in black-and-white. It's the day of the moon landing, and Rob Romoni and Andreas Stern (who just happens to look period-perfect with his beefy hairy body and handlebar mustache) are waiting for the big moment. Andreas goes into the garage and discovers blond twink Chip Noll, who can't remember anything about himself. "Amnesia," Rob helpfully notes. All he can remember is being called "Skyler."
Chip goes to bed and has these flashes of his life, bizarre weather and science, scary enough to wake him up. He leaves the room to find Andreas sitting in a chair with his thick massive dick hard, Rob filming him with a good old-fashioned camera. Andreas sits in all his hirsute glory with a gigantic uncut cock hard and waiting, pumping himself for a long time with Rob encouraging him. Chip gets hard watching. After showing off his ass and jacking off, Rob decides to get more. "Why don'tcha come over here and work on me," he opines. Andreas hits the floor to suck the awesomely muscled smooth Rob. It's a deep fast-paced blowjob with Andreas' own hard cock swinging in camera range. Rob can't help but cum on Andreas' chest after not too long. Rob then gets his chance to suck Andreas, slowly and ultra-sensually with sexy eye contact and great foreskin play. This gets Chip to beat off ferociously and retire to bed happily. Rob then sticks his beautifully formed ass out at Andreas, who has the pleasure of licking it with all of his available head. Andreas fucks Rob with a solid fuck, so easy for a man of his size. Rob, in his muscled glory, stands firm and makes Andreas work hard to overcome his butt. The scene is edited swiftly so soon enough Andreas is pulling out to cum. In the morning, Rob and Andreas discover Chip is gone, but decide to let him go, since the mountains are going to be hard enough for survival. In the woods, Chip sees more of those memories and falls asleep.
It's 1979 and we're in Palm Springs, in color. It's big-lipped Adriano's birthday and his brother, spikey-haired Latino cutie Jonathon Gabriel is giving him a present of three boys. It seems one hasn't shown up, but hunky Mario Ortiz and rock-solid blond Riley Porter are there. Just as things are about to start, Cameron Fox shows up and is mistaken for the third boy, roped into the orgy party. Mario takes on Cameron's long cock and Jonathon's while Adriano works those lips to deep-throat Riley. The action wisely centers on Mario, who dazzles with his passionate blowing of Cameron and Jonathon. Mario assaults the cocks separately, but his best work comes when he takes them together. He starts out using his hands, but once the dicks are trapped in his mouth, he lets the hands slip away and the dicks stay. Watch the close-up action of his tongue swirling around them and it won't be hard to understand why they don't move. Jonathon helps Mario sucks Cameron with great sharing as Adriano, his untanned rounded rump a dream, gets it munched by Riley with an aggressive tongue-fuck. Riley ratchets up the oomph of their pairing and then it's off to the fucking. Adriano, blowing the incredibly well-hung Mario, gets fucked by Cameron, who wins extra points for his stylistic gyrations at quiet Adriano. Meanwhile, Jonathon fucks Riley, and does so with total excellence. Jonathon is more potent than might be expected, working hard to overcome Riley's substantial frame. Suddenly the focus of the action is on Jonathon and Riley, although Adriano is taking a sublime fuck from Cameron. Cameron pulls out to cum on Adriano's ass and Mario creams on his shoulder. Jonathon gets a stunning late-in-the-game deep-throat from Riley that gets him to cum and Adriano finishes with Cameron nibbling his balls.
Cameron admits to Adriano that he wasn't from the agency. He had come instead to answer the ad Adriano placed for a handyman. Adriano hires him, this mysterious man with the name Skylar. Well, without any memories, Cameron invents quite a delightful present with Adriano. In a lush montage, replete with passionate slow-motion photography, great appropriate music and wonderful editing, we watch Adriano and Cameron fall in love. They each get some blowing time, they laugh by the pool, kiss in the shower, 69 on the bed and cum all over each other during the montage. But, Cameron is still plagued by the dreams, 10 years later. "I could feel the bounty hunters getting close to my location," he says and knows he has to leave in order to assure Adriano's safety. Cameron is quite sad because his Syklar character has fallen deeply in love with Adriano. "My fate leads me back to the mountains from which I came. I will go there merely to exist, merely to escape," Cameron says in voiceover. Okay, the dialogue is a bit hokey, but it's appropriate to the story. "I will isolate myself from the world I love," he sadly says as he treks into the mountains.
In the present, Skyler has grown up into Steve Rambo, wearing the same outfit and made to suffer though the flicks only weak moment, an hysterical bit of goofiness where Steve eats random berries in the woods and drinks from his cowboy hat, all the while rattling off lines like, "I will sleep until I am found," because he knows the answers to his past are in his slumber. This part is necessary to the plot, but more than a tad overdone as Steve sees the history of the 20th Century stock footage in his dreams: rockets, cotton candy, lady factor workers, trussed-up pugilists, etc. This brings us to the opening of the story, where Steve had been mysteriously captured and needed to quickly remember who he was.
Meanwhile, Ray Harley, as the brilliant scientist who is responsible for the Skyler project, meets military man Maxime Cannon after nearly 16 years, the last time they had knowledge of Skyler's whereabouts. At the time, they had an affair to keep the research going. Ray is there to examine Steve and "send him back out," but Maxime wants to revisit the old days first. "Make me put out so I could go to work on Skyler," Ray sarcastically notes before admitting that Maxime never needed to rope him into sex even back then. They hightail it to a cozily-lit room for sex. Maxime, looking more buff than ever, stands beautifully while Ray fights with Maxime's underwear to get to the cock inside. The gargantuan piece is more than anyone could handle, but dependable Ray gorges himself on tons of it. With Maxime face-fucking him, Ray works total magic in a beautifully executed blowjob. Maxime then tongue-bathes Ray's hairy butt in another exciting part, following by Maxime giving Ray a lusty wet suckjob. Naturally, Maxime fucks ace bottom Ray, who has no problem taking all of Maxime's super-sized cock. The close-ups of Maxime jamming it into Ray are just stunning. There is great power, oodles of energy and astounding chemistry. If the scene looks easy, it's only because of those three points, not because it's at all lazy. Maxime fucks Ray in a few positions, maintaining a scary tireless pace until Ray cums being fucked. Maxime finally unloads on the already-wet Ray.
Post-coitus, Ray goes to Steve, whom he finds unconscious on a bed, clutching a picture of himself (as the younger Cameron) and his beloved Adriano. Maxime trots off to call Jack Ryan, the leader of the bounty hunter gang who had captured Steve, telling them to relax before embarking on another mission to release Steve into the wilds of South America for a special project. Scientist Ray begs Maxime not to go through with the mission (which I won't reveal), pleading, "I will go above your head. I won't let you destroy him!" before pulling a gun on Maxime. It's here we learn a huge chunk about the past of Skyler too.
How about those bounty hunters? After chasing Skyler through the ages (and they can hardly be old enough to have met him in 1979, let alone 1969), they really do need some time off. "There's nothing worse than going on an assignment with a full load," blue-balled Brad Benton says to Jack and Arpad Miklos. Arpad is willing to take himself in hand and Jack is quick to jump on the hardness. An astounding specimen, Arpad has a magnetism that is intense. As proof, watch the blowjob Jack Ryan gives him. Jack, a dependable if often sleepy performer, gives one of his best performances ever in this scene. He goes full-throttle apeshit on Arpad's cock, licking, sucking, doing whatever to please this cock. Jack goes on and on until Brad can't take it anymore and joins him. Jack moves down to the balls so Brad can suck it a bit. They share, and there's plenty of Arpad's delicious cock to go around. After lots of time spent on Arpad, Arpad himself joins the action sucking Jack while Brad continues on his mighty cock. The behemoth Arpad is a powerhouse sucker as well, and Brad does equally good work. Arpad then gets to fuck Brad, who sucks Jack. Well, he tries, because Arpad is fucking him with so much brutish force that it's hard for Brad to keep Jack in his mouth! Brad, always a big moaner, is outrageously loud here because Arpad hits him so strongly. Jack then fucks Brad, now on his back, with Arpad in his mouth. Jack's fuck isn't as nastily apt as Arpad's, but it's a stylistically perfect hip-swivel that sinks deep into Brad. Jack pulls out for a wowing shot all over Brad, met by one from Arpad and one from Brad.
Back at the secret compound, Ray hits a lot of buttons and wakes up Steve. He then explains the whole history to Steve. Ray acts the hell out of this sci-fi homage, and Ray admits his goal is to get Steve (well, Skyler) to "help mankind." Ray then shows him five men who are also part of the plan and needs Steve's help with them. Ray wants him to teach them lust, which will lead to love, which will make them the same fully-operational beings as Steve, allowing them to do all this good for mankind. There are worse reasons to fall to your knees surrounded by five immense cocks belonging to hairy clear-eyed Jack Van Dean, young massively-hung uncut Jessie Cooper, finely manicured goateed Alex Steele, bearded Brunno Storni and ever-watchable brunet Andy Hunter.
Steve starts on Andy, and this leads to others imitating him. Jessie gets sucked by Alex, who is intent on getting all the way down his impossibly long piece, and does. Jack goes to Andy and we have three pairs of men who will spend the rest of the scene together. Steve's sucking is, as usual, flawless, and that helps Alex and Jack do quite the same. The guys getting sucked certainly seem to be enjoying themselves, particularly Andy and Jessie, who both seem to have their eyes rolled back in ecstasy. Steve then rims Alex, who sucks Andy, while Jack blows Brunno and Jessie. Jack rises to the star of the scene with his wonderful sucking. The fucking finds Jack riding on Andy, Jessie fucking Alex and Steve getting it from Brunno. Steve, curiously still wearing his underwear, with a slit cut in the back, naturally takes every inch of Brunno in a perfectly watchable fuck. However, Jessie steals a lot of the scene by really going at Alex with great excitement. Jack is able to ride smoothly up and down the entire length of Andy. The scene could use some position changes, but the action never flags, so that's only a small point. Jack cums being fucked, followed by a shot from the opulently foreskinned Jessie. Andy then has a geyser, followed by a blast from Alex. Steve is the last to cum. "It was immeasurable in its success," Ray notes when Steve comes back to him. As a reward, Ray sends him back to his happiest time, to Adriano, who hasn't found love since Skyler left his life in 1979.
The guys being sucked really seem to be enjoying themselves, of course. Then Steve rims Alex sucking Andy and Jack blows the other two. Jack does quite well with two great big cocks thrown at his face. Jack is actually the star of this section. Then the fucking starts. Jack rides on Andy, looking gorgeous. Jessie fucks Alex carefully and with good power. Steve gets it from Brunno. Steve curiously still wears his underwear, with a slit cut up the back. Jessie's active fuck works the best, though Jack's bouncing is lovely. Alex seems to be allowing Jessie the most leeway. Jack works the full length of Andy, impressively. It stays the same, though. The action is hot, but it could use some position changes. Jack cums being fucked. Then opulently foreskinned Jessie cums on Alex's ass. Well, near it. Andy has a geyser. Then it's Alex's turn. Steve has a nice one, though not one of his better ones. "It was immeasurable in its success," Ray notes. Ray sends him back to his happiest time, to Adriano.
And there you have it. Is that an epic or what? Director Josh Eliot really put everything he has into this gargantuan opus. It's full of special effects that stay clear of being cheesy, exciting production values (the lighting deserves particular note), and performers who excel both in dialogue and sex. Catalina has corralled its biggest stars and tossed them into this project with expert care. Cameron Fox delivers a great centerpiece performance, but he's met by guys like Adriano and Ray. However, there's no way to pick a favorite in the sex department. Each scene seems like the best one as you're watching it, which all adds up to a thrilling ride. No scene is extraneous, no guys out of place.
"69: Discover the Secret!" is divine.
DVD features: Chapters; cum-shots chapter; gallery; trailers; solos (Maxime Cannon and Aprad Miklos); and no regional coding (playable worldwide).
A DVD Review by Brent Blue