"Funhouse" is yet another outrageous vaudevillian extravaganza from director Brian Mills. These hardcore flicks, "Cirque Noir" and "Carny," the predecessors, are elaborate efforts teeming with testosterone and a very kinky brand of gay pornography. Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey, eat your fucking hearts out!
Two muscle dudes, all-American white-boy Ethan Anders and Latin papi Eduardo, visit a carnival and can't resist temptation as they're beckoned by musclebound Francois Sagat -- wearing the sexiest clown get-up ever -- to a funhouse ride. They bop about the carnival throughout, taking in rides and other diversions, and eventually get busy with the sex-on-a-stick carny clown in the finale.
The first act under the big top has Dean Flynn engaging in impressive balancing acts with a chiseled acrobat, Eric Moreau. Both men have fantastic bodies, Dean statuesque and broad-chested, and Eric, a perfect gymnast's physique that is astonishing in its muscularity and flexibility. They begin with a "Cirque de Soleil"-style performance, Eric twisting and contorting his lithe frame into a variety of shapes and position as Dean acts as a human base. The acrobatics lead to cocksucking, of course, Eric making like an oral gymnast, or oralist, gulping down Dean's pretty cock (Eric drizzling pre-cum like crazy) on his knees, and then Dean rimming and sucking Eric, the rimming is of note for its lust and Eric's legs -- spread out flat like Nadia Comaneci doing one of her Olympic-level splits on the mat as Dean sniffs and licks and gnaws his glistening butthole. Dean slurps and licks Eric's fat cock too, jerking and licking it to climax, and then towers over him to jerk out his own load. They continue with more rimming, Dean shoving his face into Eric, standing and bending over this time, lapping and pleasuring the sphincter with his tongue and fingers and then replacing his tongue with his cock, fucking the vice-tight hole with vim and vigor from behind and then in a sort of side-splitting position, Eric's leg stretched upward as if he's performing a karate kick, but instead Dean's cock is fucking his hole hard. They shift to cowboy and reverse cowboy, and, riding hard, Eric pumps out a second load with Dean still in his butt. Kissing Eric and jerking his dong, Dean pulls out another load to match No. 2 from Eric.
The next carny duo, Tony Buff and Derek da Silva, put on quite a sideshow, Tony in a latex referee get-up, and Derek wearing a latex wrestling singlet and rubber mask, à la "Nacho Libre" (luckily, Derek looks NOTHING like Jack Black). Tony, shoving a shiny black butt-pleaser into Derek through a slit in the singlet's backside, works the hole for a bit before two more brutes enter the fray, Josh West and Rocky Torrez. They are also wearing rubber Mexican wrestling masks and the latex singlets with front-to-back zippers for easy access to cocks and assholes. Derek then services every cock under the tent, gagging on Tony and Josh, two huge poles, and having an easier time with Rocky's smaller one. Rocky then eats Derek's furry butt as Derek continues deep-throating Josh as Tony watches from the sidelines. Josh shifts into a thrusting face-fuck, shoving his cock in and out of Derek's wanting mouth and throat, eventually cumming all over the mat and his boots, Derek spit-polishes the dirty boot as he had the throbbing cock, and all this activity gets Rocky in the mood to cum, and, just and he's getting to the point of no return, Tony re-joins the group and pushes his gigantic cock into Rocky's greedy mouth. Needless to say, this really does the trick, Rocky becomes a convulsive mass of heaving and jerking, and quickly spits out his load. We segue to Tony fucking Derek and Josh pounding Rocky, the bottoms facing each other and kissing as their holes are pumped full of cock through the zipped-open holes of their colorful rubber singlets. These guys know how to fuck ass, particularly Tony, slamming into Derek with the power and force of a raging bull. The tops switch up, and Josh takes Derek with a more frantic pace, and Tony goes slower with Rocky's smaller ass, and then Derek sits on Tony to completion as Tony eats Josh's ass and jerks off as Josh and Rocky dump their spunk on Derek's elaborately tattooed back. All three return for a gut-punching interlude that has Derek bound and suspended midair at the Slug-O-Rama, a hard ride that has the muscular sub getting punched by his three aggressors.
Alex Baresi and Bjoern Giger are voyeurs in red-and-black latex who waste no time getting busy. Bjoern drops to his knees to feast on cock and balls, as Alex gets slurped up, there is a flow of spit dripping down. And as Alex returns the favor, Bjoern spits down a few wads while he's getting serviced, Alex reaching up to tweak Bjoern's nipple. Bjoern moans constantly as his tongue frequently flits out in ecstasy. Alex then pisses into Bjoern's mouth and all over his body. Next, Alex buries his face into Bjoern's ass and fucks him. Bjoern, on his back, grunts as Alex fucks and fucks and fucks. After they pop, Bjoern offers his ass up for more good times. Alex starts with some licking and fingering and dildos, warming Bjoern up for fisting that finds a big fist and thick forearm twisting and grinding deep inside. They end with Alex cumming and a final kiss.
Carnival-goers Eduardo and Ethan Anders wake up in latex jockstraps as their masked host watches over them, jacking his meat. Who is that masked madman? François Sagat, of course (I'd recognize that fat uncut dong anywhere!). Beefy Ethan takes turns pleasing both cocks, and François soon takes his mask off to suck and eat Ethan. The chain is encouraged by Ethan's enthusiastic oral skills on Eduardo. Ethan shows off his skilled mouth, and it appears that he clearly loves being a cocksucker. They all dump their loads on the pink-cheeked smiling sucker, Ethan. The three then kiss before François, now slurping on Ethan, offers up his hole for Eduardo's big fucking cock. The versatile stud then takes turns with Eduardo fucking Ethan. The action heats up, and Ethan shows off his pretty pink pecker as he gets pounded by both (and Eduardo bounces his cock from side to side as he watches François fuck Ethan). Eduardo jumps in again to fuck Ethan, who reaches up to grab his furry pecs before Eduardo feeds Ethan his fingers. It's a heated fuck, and they all dump their spunk on smiling Ethan.
DVD features: Chapters; widescreen; cum-shots chapter; behind-the-scenes featurette (acrobat sequences); fluffing; watersports (Francois and Ethan); trailers ("Cirque Noir"); and no regional coding (playable worldwide).
BLU-RAY features: Chapters; 1080p high-definition; versioning selection (expanded director's edit, or edit without fetish material -- no watersports or fisting); widescreen; widescreen; cum-shots chapter; behind-the-scenes featurette (acrobat sequences); fluffing; watersports (Francois and Ethan); trailer ("Cirque Noir").
A DVD + BLU-RAY Review by Butch Harris